Local High School Teacher Disgruntled:
"My bookmark doesn't work!"

Due to the fact that the bookmark was particularly slippery, and despite the cool Aristotle quote engraved into its smooth metal surface, a local high school teacher was describably "bitter" about the impracticality of his bookmark, and the fact that it never stays inside the book whenever he takes the book out of his bag.

See this video clip for the full story.